Chapter 3: Song and Dance.
Duo’s magic cape transports the Fellowship out of danger and into an ocean. The group spends several hours floating. The cold water rubbers their skin. Swallowed salt water destabilizesthem. Dawn peeks over the horizon. A beach comes within view. They help Zor Primus, who is in the beginnings of hypothermia. The injuries to his right arm prevent him from swimming—making him the first to succumb to the oceans frozen waters. Fishermen on the beach show the Fellowship to their little town. They provide food and clothes. For the last week, the Fellowship has slept in one of the local hotels—making their keep by performing jobs around the town. The town itself seems right out of the past. There is no running water or electricity. The only form of transportation is by horse and carriage.
…
“Little town…” Raven’s stiletto heels walk confidently on the uneven dirt road. A light green sun dress hugs her figure. “It’s a quiet village. Everyday…like the one before.” Like coffins uprooting from the land, sectioned bricks form a road—the entrance into town. Smoke curls from chimneys—breakfast is cooking. The morning sun softens on her shoulders. The blossoming Spring smells of jasmine and vanilla. “Little town…” The town’s business owners set up for the morning rush. They unfold curtains and post the days specials. “Full of little people, waking up to say…”
Wooden shutters smack open. Five people shout… “Hola!”
Raven waves—one hand on her wicker basket. “There goes the baker with his tray like always…” He hurries from door to door, selling his pastries. “The same old bread and rolls to sell. Everyday just the same…since the morning that we came…to this poor provincial town.”
“Good day, Raven.” The baker stops at the service window of his store.
“Good morning.”
“Where are you off to?”
“The make-up shop. I borrowed the most wonderful mascara. It makes them long and…”
“That’s nice.” The baker leans into the window. “Marie! The bagels, hurry up!”
Raven moves on. The baker isn’t interested in hearing about her mascara.
Two frumpy ladies dressed in Sunday’s best—white lace gloves and hideous amounts of perfume—cover their mouths and whisper. “Look how she applies… Her methods are so strange, no question.”
“She’s got some complexion, can’t you tell?”
“Never sticking with one brand…”
“Her blotting is so grand…”
Out of nowhere—a local boy springs up. “No denyen’ she gets me craven—that Raven!”
In the marketplace a wife beats her husband’s head with a roller after catching his eyes on the busty part of a blond. Mothers scold their children. Old men rest by the barber shop. Young workers carry large wooden crates, crack open the tops and sell.
Heads spin with Raven’s passing. The towns people whisper in ears…
What does she use?
It’s so expensive.
Raven spins the Mary Tyler Moore. “There must be more to my attractive life.”
The make-up shop has a large wooden sign nailed above its bark colored door—one of the towns wood workers has carved a compact into the oak, adding fancy borders with entangled vines.
“Ah Raven,” Mary, the store owner, rushes to the front. Mary’s hunchback stalls her. She still double-times it; Raven has become her best customer.
“Good morning. I’ve come to return the mascara I borrowed.”
The old woman’s face is covered in makeup. After palming the mascara, she looks over the label—lifting her glasses. “Did it give them length?” Mary fusses with a box near the windows—dropping the mascara in it.
“As long as fingernails. Do you have anything new?”
Mary has a cheerful snicker. “Not since yesterday.”
“I’ll try…” Raven’s finger coasts along the shelf. “This one.”
“That one? But you’ve tried it twice.”
“But it is my favorite.” Raven holds it to her heart. “Its like a lift, tuck and pull in one.”
“If you like it all that much, you can keep it, I insist.”
Mary ushers Raven out of the store. “Well, thank you! Thank you very much.”
Two boys drop into a patch of flowers. They’ve been watching Raven through the window. “There she goes, that girl is such a hottie…” Inside a black, felt box—inside Jimmy’s pocket, a large diamond is mounted on to a thin band of sunray gold. He pulls it out. “What do think she’d say if I asked?”
“With a dreamy far-off look…she’ll say she’d rather cook.” His friend cracks up.
“What a tease she is to the rest of us—that Raven!” Jimmy hides the ring in his pocket.
Raven stops at the towns center, finding a dry spot near a large fountain spitting water into the air. Sheep and birds gather around. She pets their heads, a warm smile on her face, ‘what nice coats you would all make.’ “Ohhhhhhh! Isn’t this so creamy?” Raven tilts the compact. “It’s my well kept secret, because, you’ll seeeeeeee…mixed in, is a pinch of moisturizzzer and no one will ever know this but me.”
Raven snaps the compact before one of the sheep paints his nostrils with it. She clicks along the street, passing several shops…where many converse.
“Now it’s no wonder that her name brings bounty…” Mrs. Faldon sits in the hair salon. “Savage wants her all to himself.”
Alejandro lifts and snips. “Behind that innocent glare, I see the menace within. Very dangerous to the rest of us…”
“She’s wanted by the Backstabber—yes, wanted by the Backstabber—that Raven.” Mrs. Faldon and Alejandro duet.
An arrow cuts into the air. A bird calls its last coo and nose drives onto the street.
Little Timothy jumps as the bird kersplats. “Wow! You don’t miss a shot, Azoric! You’re the greatest hunter ever!”
“I know.” He rubs his nails on his shirt.
Nicknamed the freckled mess—little Timmy follows Azoric everywhere. “No Morrigan alive stands a chance against you. Or no girl for that matter.”
“It’s true. And I have my sights set on that one.” Azoric drags Timothy’s collar, pointing him at Raven.
“That girl who came with you into town?”
“Yes, she is the one! The lucky girl I am going to marry.”
“But she is…”
“The most beautiful girl in town. And that makes her the best.” Azoric strong arms Timothy—almost strangling him. “And don’t I deserve the best?”
“Well, of course…I mean, yes, you do.”
“Right from the moment when we appeared together—she had little shoes that turned me on. In this world there is only she, who is beautiful as me.” Azoric stands up, lifting Timothy with him…Raven has walked off. He releases Timmy in midair and he falls with a symbols crash. Azoric walks after Raven. “So I am making plans to woo and marry, Raven.”
Timothy rubs his behind and stands up—only to be run over by three teenage blondes. “There he goes, isn’t he so dreamy?” Their hands meet at their hearts—their necks topple back…their melodramatic love. “Monsieur Azoric, isn’t he so cute? Be still my heart, I am hardly breathing…” The girls faint over. Timmy holds out his arms to catch them—squashed again. “He is such a tall, dark, strong and handsome prince.”
Azoric elbows his way through the crowd. The city is alive now.
“Hola!”
“Buenos Dias!”
Raven passes.
“Es muy bonita.”
“Caliente!”
“No me digas!”
Azoric grips their shoulders and throws them aside like baseballs. “Please let me through!”
Raven spins, lifting her arms. The green bliss of her hair flirts with the wind. Her sleek curves cozy themselves with the dress. “There must be more to my attractive life!”
Azoric pounds his chest. “Just watch, I am going to make Raven my wife!”
The towns people link arms, dancing. “Look there she goes her lashes are long and webby! A most particular mademoiselle. It is a pity and a sin, she is wanted for treason!
“She really is a dangerous girl!
“A beautiful but dangerous girl!
“She really is a dangerous girl!
“That Ravennnnnnnn!” [Footnote 1]
…
Zor sits up in the hospital bed. ‘Gotta like these old-time hospitals. It is more like a bed n breakfast.’ There are pink drapes over the windows and a fine, hard wood furniture set. The bed itself is soft, with cotton sheets. Steam trails from a cup of tea at his bed side. He doesn’t wear a shirt—his shoulder and wrist are in casts.
‘Enough of this! Your arm is out of commission, it doesn’t mean the rest of you is!’ Zor kicks the blanket to the ground. ‘Wow, what a draft.’ Zor fuses with the hospital gown. He needs pants. By timing his jumps, arm movements and creating a dance he nicknames, ‘where your toes should never go,’ Zor hurls himself into his pants, potato sack racing along the floor.
“What are you doing?” Q slams the door. “Are you insane?” She runs to his side—her short green hair slick wet from bathing. She levels his weight while he buttons. “There…now get back in bed.”
“Look Q, I appreciate all you’ve done for me.” Being the doctors assistant, it is her job—Zor doesn’t care. “But where I come from, we don’t put people with dislocated shoulders and broken wrists to pasture.” Zor grunts the statement—gravity feels like a forklift tearing out his arm.
“Maybe you forgot—but I didn’t.” She fists his belt and keeps him from falling. “Your friends dragged you here, nearly dead from the cold of the ocean. You are lucky Dr. Kurosama could save your life. Now look, you can hardly stand, get back in bed.” She throws his arm over her shoulder. “Now come on, get to bed. Stop trying to be such a tough guy.”
“I am not trying to be a tough guy.” ‘I hope she likes that I am acting like such a tough guy.’ “And where I come from—we don’t listen to our doctors. I’m fine.”
“You’re fine?” If Q didn’t worry so much, she’d be rolling on the floor, laughing up a lung. “Did you break your brain with your shoulder? Now get back to bed.”
“I’m fine.”
“Alright, tough guy. You’re so fine? How about this, you do a couple of movements for me and I’ll let you stroll on out of here.” Q releases him. She straightens her nurses uniform and stands straight—her body in anticipation. “You ready? Here we go, head and shoulders, knees and toes—knees and toes. Head and shoulders, knees and toes—knees and toes.”
Zor frowns. “Of course, I can’t do that!”
“I like your hair. It is like a big ball of cotton candy.” ‘Oh my God…’ She stomps her foot. “But enough chat, get back to bed.” Zor sits in bed and puts the sheets over him. “And don’t move.”
Q straightens up the room and leaves. She has other patients to check on. Seconds later, the door opens a sliver and a curious eyeball spies into the room.
“Hello, Marrin.”
“Hello—” She walks into the room. “You feeling any better today?”
“Not especially.”
“Bet I can fix that.”
“Really?” Zor asks.
She walks up to the bed and rips off the sheet. She frowns at his blue jeans. “And all my friends told me you were easy.”
…
The cape wears Duo twenty-four hours a day. The longer it wears him—the more power Duo commands. Nothing—regrettably—compares to the power of the terminal. ‘I transported eight people clear across a world…just because I wanted to.’ One moment, he awaits death in Savage’s lair…the next, he sinks in the ocean, awaiting death.
The Fellowship go about their days. Each knows the mission of the Matrix. For now, they ignore the calling. Duo can not do this—every morning he awakes to dissipating dreams of the ocean. Somewhere at its floor, under some sand—probably a star fish or two latched on it—the second terminal of the Matrix rests.
‘I can’t believe I dropped it. What was I thinking?’ At the time, he wasn’t. His arms tangled in the cape, it was the Matrix or him…hard to believe he regrets the decision.
Ever since arriving, the mountains in the distance call his name. He expects the its origin is the snowy peak. Half way up the mountain, it becomes obvious that no living creature can climb any further.
There is a cave…
“Stop. That is far enough.” Duo looks into the cave…nothing. The very tip of his big toe has crossed the threshold. “You are not welcome here.”
“That can’t be.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ve been calling me.” Duo squints his eyes. He doesn’t see the man.
“I have? Then by all means, come in.”
Duo rolls his shoulder, the cape covers him. He steps into the cave. The floor peaks to several sharp points. ‘If I trip, I’m dead.’ Slick rocks with growing fungus hydroplane his shoes. His hands grip the walls in a mad desperation to preserve life.
Several minutes pass. ‘How can this be? The voice sounded so close.’ He looks back, a small dot marks the entrance.
A ray of light—like a tinker bell with little pixies burning off its tail flies across the cave. It stops in the far corner and brightens into a large ball of light. Sitting Indian style, staff at his side, an old man meditates before a fire. His eyes are deep pits. His large ears have tuffs of sprouting silver. A long beard rests in his lap. His gangly, bony fingers complete a circle with his thumbs—resting on his knees…a washboard spine. It looks as uncomfortable as a unfolding lawn chair and as inviting as a warm bath.
“Hello?” Duo asks.
“Your cape, you can remove it.”
“I—I don’t know how.” His hand clinches the cape—ready to fight.
“Boy, I know of magic’s far more powerful than that cape. I won’t take it. Now stop being such an idiot.” The man’s voice grows large, echoing to all ends. His mouth does not open beyond a whispers volume. “You don’t even know how to use it.” Duo doesn’t object—in voice, however, his mind is alive with thought. “It is true, you don’t. Why on Earth would you walk up this mountain and walk to this cave when you have a magic cape?”
Logic prevails—Duo tugs on the cape. It falls off and lies like a dog playing dead, losing its texture. “I guess you know why I’ve come here then.”
“And you don’t? You want to know about the Matrix.” Duo does not respond. The old man’s eyes open. “Enough of this.” He jumps to his feet and snatches his staff. “I think we’ve gone on with the dramatics long enough. I called you here to show you something.”
“I will follow—but first, tell me who you are.”
“I am Rekiski, the most powerful wizard of the new world. Is that enough for you?” Rekiski need only look into Duo’s eyes to see his lack of faith. “No, Savage is not the most powerful—since that is what you are thinking.” Duo feels the little man messing around in his head. “Even Savage wouldn’t try with the likes of me.”
Rekiski starts for the rear of the cave, Tinker and her pixies leading the way. Duo expects the air to become grungy and stale; instead, it smells like the mountain valley, crisp and new.
“This wall depicts the story of Mylene.” Tinker holds stead in front of the wall and glows a peeling orange. “It is in an ancient language. A language I have been unable to read. For my entire life I have been attempting a translation. Then a few weeks ago, I just knew how to read the texts.”
“Mylene?” Duo’s concentration remains on the wall.
“Yes, Mylene. The mother of us all. The true creator. The one who gave birth to Steve Bateman—the man who brought you to this world.”
That name—Steve Bateman—the urgency it puts in Duo’s body. He moves in ways he doesn’t want to, throwing the old man to the ground. He lays his hands on the markings. “What does it say? You must tell me.” He is short of breath.
Rekiski climbs the stick like a rope. “It is a song. Would you like me to sing it?”
A long time ago…a very long time ago
The universe was nothing but black
And there was a woman named Mylene
With pink hair and a really cute a$%
And this woman named Mylene
She had the power to shape everything
Thus comes the birth of splendid life
For beauty was all she intended
To ensure that her universes would live on
She gave birth to two very proud sons
One was named Steve Bateman. And the other was full of hatred.
Known only as the Backstabber.
They disagreed over everything
They argued all day and all night.
Steve Bateman was full of love for construction
And the Backstabber brought only destruction
One day the Backstabber visits his mother, Mylene
Using his charming smile, he sings,
“Mother, no longer do I wish to be asunder,
for it was my blunder, I am sorry, my mother.”
Happy to see that her son at peace
She foolishly put her guard at ease
And then, our arch enemy, the Backstabber,
Tackles her with all of his might
Trapping her in the Matrix, cut off from sight
She loses her powers, loses her light
Steve Bateman returns to see his mother has died
And Backstabber sitting in her thrown
He wrestles with his brother
Defeated, the Backstabber promises another
Sneaking out vowing vengeance
Disappearing into the dark…
The Matrix gone with him
The whole world turned to dark
Steve Bateman knows how to stop him
Calling upon the eight with might…
To stop the Backstabber and his henchmen
To be heroes of the light
You see, the Matrix is the power of everything living
And soon it will retake its form
The eight must fight for the world
Using only their courage and their wits
But if they listen very closely,
They can hear Mylene calling…
“Save my universe.”
Duo steps back—the Wizard has constructed some kind of delusion in his mind. ‘Delusions don’t echo, do they?’ The faint trails of Mylene’s voice travel across the cave.
“I heard her.”
“Then you are the one.” [F2]
…
“I can’t believe it foodmart. You really have a knack for finding these lagoons.”
“Yeah I guess I do.”
He helps Raven down the steep rocks. He separates exotic vines with care, preventing damage. Large pink flowers grow on vines circling the trunks of trees and twisting over rocks. Crickets rest on their backs, as if vacationing at a sunny resort. One leg folded over the other, moving in melody. With his hand on the small of her back, he leads her through the mist.
“Let me help with you those.”
Foodmart unfastens her heels. Raven slips out of her shoes and sits on the rock. It is jagged in the corner. Her leg falls asleep under its pressure. Her ankles soak in the water, she doesn’t want to move.
“I have to admit Raven. I didn’t just bring you here to see the lagoon.” Raven seems surprised—and yet, not. “I have a song I’ve written for you. I want you to listen to it. And don’t say a word until I’ve sung the entire song.”
“Okay.”
Foodmart distances himself and clears his throat. He breaths deep. “Oh, right.” He foolishly reaches for his back pocket. “The lyrics.” He pats the paper against his head—Raven grins. “After all of the biting is over… After all of the killing is done… Will you be the one? To find yourself alone with your heart? Searching for your foodmart…” foodmart sings unaccompanied at first. The sounds of the lagoon sync from all sides. Seconds pass in a sweet hum. The crickets find the beat. The flowers arch at their steam, blossoming peddles spread a pink love across the muck. “When it seems like Azoric is getting old. Will you remember that I am ageless? Can you pretend? That a vampire can fall in love?
“I’m out here on my own!”
Fish jump from the water, flapping their fins: “Lonely vampire boy!”
“I’m out here on my own!”
Little birds chirp, jumping to the edge of branches: “Lonely vampire boy!”
Foodmart bows to one knee. He takes his hand in her own. “With all the fair maidens and none of the Ravens.” She blushes. “Do you think that I could make you happy? Holding you in my soulless embrace? Now what do you say? Now that I am standing here?
“I’m out here on my own!”
Frogs leap on lilies, their tongues unfold like a long red carpet. On each tongue, three flies in cocktail dresses lock shoulders and can-can to the blasting horns of a whales blow hole: “Lonely vampire boy.”
“I’m alllll alllloooonnnneeeeeeee…”
Butterflies flap their wings, sending soft fuzz floating along the air. “Lonely vampire boy.”
Bubbles pop at the surface of the lagoon. The water ripples. A giant plant surfaces. Water runs off its green skin. The plant’s mouth opens—a Venus fly Trap with transitioning reds, oranges and yellows at its center. Its prickly thorns extend and stretch. Inside a dark, curly haired, top hat wearing, cigarette smoking, ‘something’ fingers a Fender—hitting the solo so powerful the entire world shakes. Thirty lizards backstroke around the fly trap, splashing water into the air with their tales. The clouds part and the moonlight shines down, white scaled fish reflect like a disco ball.
“I don’t believe it!” Raven’s eyes swell at what could be the creature from the black lagoon. “Foodmart, is that?”
“Yep, it’s Slash from Guns n Roses.”
Slash rocks the guitar with each note—a chapel in the desert performance. The fly trap descends back into the water, the jaw closing on Slash.
“I’m out here on my own!”
The fish soar, one after the other, criss-crossing and flipping little fountains. The frogs hiccup her name and leap in sequence. Crickets clamor in a burst of sound. The butterflies whisper in her earlobe and scent her hair. The birds fly: “Lonely vampire boy!”
“Are you lonely? Out here on your own?”
Reprise: “Lonely vampire boy!”
“I’m so lonely.”
The crickets fade out and the animals disappear. The lagoon is silent.
“Foodmart, I don’t know what to say—”
“Say you’ll love me forever.” Foodmart moves in for a kiss.
“Oh, never.” She pushes him away.
With his heart in his shoes and his stomach in his throat, “Why not?”
“Well…Azoric…”
“What the hell does that fool have that I don’t?”
“Have you seen his pecs lately?” Raven smiles. That tingle runs down her spine. “What I want to know, how does he work out? Know what I mean?”
“No!” foodmart shouts. “Alright, obviously, you weren’t listening to the song. Perhaps if I—” Raven disagrees. “Wonderful. Okay…all right. I have another song.” foodmart finds another piece of paper. “Here I go. You find me strong and bold. And how you want me so, so much. So much you know you need that touch. To lead the way to love…”
“Just stop it foodmart.” Raven backs away.
“Why? You haven’t even heard the whole song.”
“I don’t love you. I love Azoric. Besides, sing anymore of that and you are going to get sued.” [F3]
…
Fields spends her time by herself now. The town bothers her. All that peace…all those happy people moving about—minding their business. She wants to grab the chest of their shirts and shake some sense into them…‘the universes are ending! Why don’t your stupid a#$es start mourning—or at the very least help.’ The towns people don’t seem to care.
This Steve Bateman has all the aces up his sleeve. ‘What a strange world.’
With Raven dizzying for Azoric, foodmart losing his mind over it and Zor Primus unable to decide between Q and Marrin, he Fellowship could tear itself apart with love affairs and jealousy. She won’t be part of it. ‘If Marrin starts to think he is two-timing her, the last thing he’ll have to complain about is his arm.’
Outside the town, locals farmers work the land. Beyond that the forest calls. Somehow though, Fields walks well beyond the forest. More than fifteen miles out of town.
“I’ve found you.” Savage blocks Fields path.
“Yes, you’ve found me. And it took you long enough. Now change me back.”
Savage snaps his fingers and the supermodel morphs into…the Backstabber!
“Have you retrieved the second terminal, sir?”
“No.” The Backstabber runs his hands though his hair. He hates the transformation process, but he will not lose to Steve Bateman again. The fool thinks he is so clever—constructing this world, uprooting the characters…‘We’re all just supposed to bow to his will?’ Backstabber will not. “They’ve lost it.” Savage turns around. “After Duo transported us out of your castle, we landed in an ocean. The surprise caused him to drop it.”
“It is at the ocean floor?”
“No, it is on the mountains peak. I just told you he dropped it in the ocean!” Backstabber throws his blue cape over his shoulders. He fuses with his brown uniform—a large V on its right chest pocket. “And what help are you anyway? I told you, I’d get them to your castle—pester them until they couldn’t resist. You knew I was bringing the Fellowship and you left a magic cape out for them to have? As it is, Duo never takes it off and he is becoming a larger threat.”
Savage isn’t surprised. Backstabber sits on a stump.
Savage asks, “Do you want to go home?”
“Yes.”
In that moment, they defy gravity. Backstabber stays in his sitting position while flying up. He contemplates the situation. With time, the sky blackens. They float in space, heading for Maxwell Station—the famous military base, hijacked by Sixty weeks before Steve Bateman forced them into this world.
“What are we supposed to do? Kill Duo?” Backstabber and himself move into one of the air locks.
“Exactly.” Backstabber’s psychotic grin overpowers his face. “I know that your powers of redemption are as strong as any wizards magic tricks. But capable as you, pay attention! My words are a matter of pride.” The room pressurizes. The magnetic lock opens. The doors move along hinges. “It is clear from your angry expressions…soon the terminal will be here. But we’re talking universes and destruction. Even we can be caught unprepared. So prepare for the chance of a lifetime! Prepare for sensational news. A—shiny—new—era—is-tip-towing-nearer…” Backstabber MJ’s on his tip-toes and strides along the floor.
“And where do we fit in?” Savage asks.
“Just listen to teacher.” They enter a large central room. Headquarters until they find a way to break out of this world. Sixty is waiting for them. He is shorter than the two, with a mess of brown hair. Dressed in his flight suit, the ace pilot turned criminal mastermind wants out of his place more than the others. His mecha does not function here. “The universes are sorted and we’ll be rewarded…when at last I am given my thrown. And injustice across the land—be prepared!”
Sixty steps forward. “Yes, sir, we will be prepared.”
“We must eliminate Duo.” Backstabber sits in his large thrown. At its side, a small coffee table. He sips at his protocoffee. “Then no one can stop us.”
Savage steps forward. “It is great that we will soon be connected with access to the center of everything new.”
Backstabber finishes, “Of course, quid pro quo, you’ll be expected…to kill the little bugger for good. The future is yours to command. But although you play your part—the point that I must emphasize is…you don’t have any power without me! Be prepared for the worlds of destruction…be prepared for a changing in the guard. Merciless planning—tenacity spanning. Millennia’s of denial, is simply while I’ll be—creator undisputed, respected, saluted and seen for the leader I am. Be prepared.”
A silence stretches along wasted time. Sixty speaks up. “Oh, that’s it. I thought there was more. Great song, Backstabber.”
“Wait, you didn’t like it?”
“No, I liked it. Did you like it, Savage?”
“Loved it.” [F3]
…
Duo spends the rest of the day with the old man. Learning more about the folklore surrounding the existence of Steve Bateman—and this Mylene. Even though he wants the stay, Rekiski insists he leave. When he returns to town, he is exhausted. Without realizing it, he lets the cape fall off his shoulders before falling asleep.
Exactly the moment Punkr has waited for.
“It’s a party fellas. Have a good time. Hello, ladies.” On the edge of town—per Punkr creative imagination and the cape’s magic power—an empty hill of land transforms. Palm trees sprout out of the ground, their giant branches with large leafs open like umbrellas. At random, a pirates bar with a real life talking Parrot and a tap that never runs out appears. Tiki torches fall from the sky and land in the ground—a few feet from each other. People start appearing—beefy men, muscle beach types stand by the bar and fuss with their hair. Girls from the town show up in two-size-too-small bikinis, waxed and somehow tan—‘the cape pulls through again!’
Punkr conjures up his own pair of trunks and joins the fun.
“Have you tried the hot tub, yet?”
A group of giggling brunettes stands by the hot tub, enthralled by the bubbles and jets. “What is that?”
The babes don’t know who this new stranger is. They like him though.
“Let me introduce the three of you to what I like to call the twenty-first century.” He puts hands around two of the girls waists and ushers them along. ‘Chicks everywhere…loud music…hot tubs. And Duo wanted to use this thing to fight evil…what a nut.’
One of the girls puts her tip-toe in the bubbling water. “It’s hot.” She jumps back and rubs hips with Punkr.
“It certainly is—” He looks into the her eyes. ‘No way I just said that! This cape is making me a player too! I am so gonna score tonight!’
She smiles. “You are coming in too, right?”
“Oh, yes I am.”
The hot tub is a large circle. Soon, it is full with bikini bearing (and some not bearing) girls and Punkr. They giggle and splash water, drink and fight for his attention. ‘This is sooooo the life. I am never leaving this party.’
“You look tired. Let me help you relax.” One of the girls sits on the brick above, draping either leg over Punkr’s shoulders. Her hands rub his collar and neck, one finger slides along his jawline, to his chin. She leans his head back. “Are you feeling better Punkr?”
Two giant melons dangle before his face…that goofy smile—so big and wide it hurts—stretches along his cheeks. “I’ve never felt so good.”
“What the hell is going on?” Duo shouts.
“Oh man, you’re just in time. Get in here. Girls, you can make room, right?”
“Where is the cape?”
“Behind the bar.” Duo takes two steps for it. Punkr stops him. “And it is perfectly safe. Now get in here.”
“You don’t understand the power of that cape. You can’t just leave it laying around.” Duo walks over the bar. He opens the cabinets, pushing everything aside. In the last drawer he finds the cape crumpled in a ball. Duo dawns the cape and walks into the middle of the party. “Party is over, people.” With a single thought, the entire setting disappears into nothing. The cold night returns. The girls cover themselves with towels and run home for warmer clothes.
Punkr sits on grass. He mouth hanging open. ‘My party… My party… I was gonna score. I was gonna score.’ “Hey that is so not cool, man.” Punkr jumps to his feet. “I’m sorry I took the cape, alright? But you didn’t have to do that.”
“You wouldn’t understand.” Duo walks away.
…
Two days later.
The Fellowship sits in a circle. Being the leader, Azoric stands up, separating his hand from Raven’s—foodmart pretends not to notice. “Alright, things have gotten a little strange since coming to this town, I know.” Cussing and hair pulling might prevail if the Fellowship didn’t focus. “But it is perfectly natural for two human beings to, uh….and vampires I might add, to come together and…” ‘Man, I am just as bad at this as my father was.’ “Well, let’s just say, kiss. I think at first we were so shocked by this world and our mission that we hid our feelings…and that always makes them build, until it is just pumping in your arteries, out of your veins, in and out, in and out…” The entire group befalls to heat. Azoric clears this throat. “And that’s fine, too. But we also have a mission and I’ve come here to remind us of that mission.”
They all pretend not to know what each other are talking about. Raven and Marrin exchange glances—a glance Marrin doesn’t approve of.
Marrin jabs foodmart with her elbow. “Hey, do you know what ‘kawai kawai kaboom’ means?”
Raven’s pupils go from black to raging fires of hate and death.
“No, no idea at all.” Foodmart responds. “And who the hell would say anything like that? And what’s with the ‘kaboom’? Marrin, you should pull this person aside, give them some pointers.”
“Yeah Marrin, why don’t you do that?” Raven tilts her head.
The connections add up in foodmart’s head. “You said it?” He points at Raven. “I love it, especially the part with the ‘kaboom!’” Foodmart throws his arms in the air. “Pure genius—if someone walked up to me in a dark alley and said that…well, if I wasn’t a vampire, I’d be running so fast, I’d be…well, really running fast.” Raven is not appeased. Foodmart takes the cue and shuts his mouth.
Punkr tires of seeing their sagas develop over the last days. He has his own heartache. “Personally, I think what I did was just fine. I don’t have any regrets. I had a party, so what? I’ve almost been killed multiple times since appearing here, I needed to unwind.” Punkr speaks over Duo’s impending rebuttal. “Okay, so I used magic. But it wasn’t like I was making people do things. I made the spa and the bar. They were partying of their own accord. I mean, it was so cool.”
“It wasn’t cool,” Duo replies.
“Actually,” foodmart says. “I thought it was pretty cool. All those girls and everything.” Raven’s look of displeasure has not left. foodmart coughs and continues to shut-up.
“Very cool,” Zor adds.
“No kidding,” Azoric nods.
Marrin and Raven give their upset girlfriend stares. Azoric and Zor cough and shut up.
foodmart says, “So, we’re all pretty much in love with each other then?” The entire group slants their eyes in opposite directions. “Fine…fine and dandy, really.” He eyes Raven. “You know, it is just that, when people really have strong feelings for each other, they sometimes get together and…”
“Oh, foodmart—that’s disgusting,” Raven responds.
“What?” foodmart throws his arms in the air. “What? I was gonna say baking cookies. Sometimes people get together and they bake cookies. Why? What were you guys thinking?” Punkr lowers his head in embarrassment. “Oh Punkr, I’m ashamed of you. I really am.”
Continued in Chapter 4!
[F1] “Belle (Little Town),” Beauty and the Beast, 1991, Disney.
[F2] I think I wrote this? Can’t remember…….
[F3] “Lonely Solider Boy,” Robotech, 1985, Harmony Gold.
[F4] “Be Prepared,” The Lion King, 1994, Disney.
This is a lounge fiction amongst friends. It borrows some concepts from various pop culture media sources like Lord of the Rings, Robotech, and Star Wars.
Lord of the Matrix 